Thursday, December 14, 2006

Why I Heart Librarians

You may not think it, but this necklace is the jewellery of choice for one sassy librarian I know. Nothing surprises me when it comes to librarians and their desire for personal adornment. With rockstar librarian Nancy Pearl in BrisVegas, (love the action doll), I thought it timely to discuss the topic. During a past life spent working in libraries and even growing up in library culture (father was a librarian) I have been able to study them and develop my own market research theories. You've basically got your 3 archetypes - I'll ignore the male variety as the population sample is too insignificant for analysis - Buffy's Giles is really all you need to know here.
  1. Lifestyle Librarian. A passion for books, knowledge, databases, cataloguing, internet etc.
    Navy cardigans and sensible shoes are the unofficial uniform here. These come in 2 main categories:
    a) Conservative on the outside while groovy on the inside proving once more that you can't judge a book by its cover. These ones are politically and socially enlightened and may surprise you with their dance moves. They are a good market for brooches - on their navy cardigans and small neat earrings with strings of beads.
    b) Conservative on the outside, conservative on the inside - somewhat of a stereotype I'm afraid and definitely a minority group in the throes of extinction. These are the ones that perhaps should have gone to police academy but somehow wound up in library school. Noted for an overzealous approach to enforcement of library rules and lack of sense of humour, they have no use for unecessary adornment which only gets in the way when they have to tackle misbehaving library patrons.

  2. Liberated Librarians. These are the stylish and/or geeky ones out to prove that being a librarian does not exclude one from excercising the personal expression of weirdness. Who knows what they do in their spare time but don't be fooled by the strange garb and hair colour- these ones really know their stuff and are the prime target for contemporary jewellery and designer/unique clothing. From afar they resemble flocks of brightly coloured parakeets chattering away and sharing information and style tips. Anything goes and they like to outdo their colleagues - something that the savvy jeweller can use to their advantage.

  3. Lipstick Librarians. Avoid these women. You can normally hear the approach of their trashy stilettos (*clik*clak*clik*clak*) although they may engage stealth mode on carpeted surfaces. They are generally to be found in sections of the library called 'Corporate Services' and are characterised by an all consuming lust for power. If you do see one approach, the best course of action is to ward them off with dusty printed matter which acts like a form of kryptonite, weakening their powers. As potential jewellery clients, don't bother. These women have no class and are only looking for ways to conspicuously display their power and status.

6 comments:

nicole said...

CLASSIC post. LOL. Thanks. Loving that necklace.

printz said...

Ha Ha!I recognised some of the Librarians, although I realise you have altered a few details to avoid being sued. Perhaps the most sinister librarian was the one in "The Name of the Rose". Are there any sinister fictional female librarians? Must work on this! Dad

Rebecca-the-Wrecker said...

Sean McMullen's sci-fi book, 'Souls in the Great Machine' speculates about a future where powerful female librarians have taken over the world and enslaved men to work in the 'calculors', a form of human powered computer...

Rebecca-the-Wrecker said...

thanks nicole!

Florence said...

hahaha, another classic Wrecker excusson into the whole of niche marketing :D

xx

shane said...
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